Today was awful. I was so tired and this is probably going to be such a short blog because I just want to get off of the computer and clean my room and possibly sleep because I am so ugh.
I saw like, my biggest crush of the moment today, and I didn't even talk to him, and I just feel so stupid and shy and I don't know.
But, I auditioned for my schools musical, South Pacific. I made it, because no one gets cut, I'm pretty excited. I'll blog tomorrow night, yeah, I don't know. I'm just so ugh right now, I'm a dimwit.
Maybe I'll see him again tomorrow and I can actually try? I don't know.
Love always,
Me.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Day Two: I'm Completely Stressed Out and School Just Started...
I don't really know what I'm doing with my life at this moment, and this will probably end up being complete rambles about everything that's going on in my mind and such, so I'm just warning you. I put The Youth on repeat on Grooveshark, I love this song so much, I think it is my favorite.
So, today was a normal day. Really, completely normal. Except I talked more at lunch and I know I sound like a real loser, but I'm proud of myself because I just want to make more friends that actually go to my school, even though there are only like 3 seconds left of my high school career, but whatever. I had cheer practice, and I saw the new dance we're going to learn for senior night. It looked pretty freaking awesome, I CANNOT wait to learn it. :3 I want to ask my coach if I can fly at senior night. I'm typically a base, but I really just want to fly at my last game, ever... I hope I can! Anyways, our school won the basketball game, it was pretty close, I'm pretty proud.
This girl on my team told me that she had a dream about me and this one girl who I used to be what I thought good friends with. We were on Jerry Springer, fighting over my ex-boyfriend, who is her current boyfriend. I just think that's insanely funny, because she can have him, ew, lmao.
Anyways, I have to write this in Notepad because for some reason it won't let me type on blogger and it won't let me even think about posting so I might have to post this tomorrow but I don't know. Ugh, whatever. Next rambling topic...
I kind of had a crush on this girl, but I think that's gone away now. I don't know, nothing would ever happen, I just like having crushes :3 heheh. And, I have a crush on this one boy, but I don't think anything will ever happen because I don't like making conversation and I don't think he likes texting and that's the only way we could ever really talk because we don't go to school together. But he's always busy anyways and I don't know. I don't think anything would happen. But, I think that about everything. I kind of just want to find someone that I can have fun with right now, but then again I really don't know what I want... I'm so confused about everything.
So, I'm going to get ready for bed, I believe, and then I think I'm actually going to get into bed before 12 AM. I really need to clean my room but my mental exhaustion is pretty crazy right now, and I'm just going to bring my APES book to school tomorrow so I can finish that and my Pre-Calc homework so I'll only have Computer Graphics to work on tomorrow at home so maybe I can nap after the game and then I can wake up and clean my room and such and I don't know...
I think having this whole 365 days blog is going to be awesome in a year, to look back on my last semester of high school, and then looking at my first semester of college. I don't know, I'm going to be a completely different person then, and perhaps I'll evolve in my writing and be a better writer, but I'm really not asking much out of this besides to prove to myself I can do something, hehe. :3
Well, I guess I'm off, even though I really want to continue writing... But, I really don't have much to talk about, besides I could tell you in detail my day but I'd prefer to not make you snooze. ;]
OH WAIT, today I wrote a Pledge of Allegience, but I'm too lazy to open my backpack so I'll tell you what it is tomorrow, and I'll probably base my whole post off of that and my new years resolutions.
Love always,
Me.
So, today was a normal day. Really, completely normal. Except I talked more at lunch and I know I sound like a real loser, but I'm proud of myself because I just want to make more friends that actually go to my school, even though there are only like 3 seconds left of my high school career, but whatever. I had cheer practice, and I saw the new dance we're going to learn for senior night. It looked pretty freaking awesome, I CANNOT wait to learn it. :3 I want to ask my coach if I can fly at senior night. I'm typically a base, but I really just want to fly at my last game, ever... I hope I can! Anyways, our school won the basketball game, it was pretty close, I'm pretty proud.
This girl on my team told me that she had a dream about me and this one girl who I used to be what I thought good friends with. We were on Jerry Springer, fighting over my ex-boyfriend, who is her current boyfriend. I just think that's insanely funny, because she can have him, ew, lmao.
Anyways, I have to write this in Notepad because for some reason it won't let me type on blogger and it won't let me even think about posting so I might have to post this tomorrow but I don't know. Ugh, whatever. Next rambling topic...
I kind of had a crush on this girl, but I think that's gone away now. I don't know, nothing would ever happen, I just like having crushes :3 heheh. And, I have a crush on this one boy, but I don't think anything will ever happen because I don't like making conversation and I don't think he likes texting and that's the only way we could ever really talk because we don't go to school together. But he's always busy anyways and I don't know. I don't think anything would happen. But, I think that about everything. I kind of just want to find someone that I can have fun with right now, but then again I really don't know what I want... I'm so confused about everything.
So, I'm going to get ready for bed, I believe, and then I think I'm actually going to get into bed before 12 AM. I really need to clean my room but my mental exhaustion is pretty crazy right now, and I'm just going to bring my APES book to school tomorrow so I can finish that and my Pre-Calc homework so I'll only have Computer Graphics to work on tomorrow at home so maybe I can nap after the game and then I can wake up and clean my room and such and I don't know...
I think having this whole 365 days blog is going to be awesome in a year, to look back on my last semester of high school, and then looking at my first semester of college. I don't know, I'm going to be a completely different person then, and perhaps I'll evolve in my writing and be a better writer, but I'm really not asking much out of this besides to prove to myself I can do something, hehe. :3
Well, I guess I'm off, even though I really want to continue writing... But, I really don't have much to talk about, besides I could tell you in detail my day but I'd prefer to not make you snooze. ;]
OH WAIT, today I wrote a Pledge of Allegience, but I'm too lazy to open my backpack so I'll tell you what it is tomorrow, and I'll probably base my whole post off of that and my new years resolutions.
Love always,
Me.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Day One: My last 'first day' of High School
Hi :] I was on tumblr, and I'm following this girl (who I think is really cool and now I go on her tumblr and her blog everyday but I find her really exciting, am I weird?) who is doing this 365 days of blogging. And, I found hers really interesting because she's a freshman in college (I believe?) and she's just getting back to her 2nd semester and, I don't know. It's just really intriguing. ANYWAYS, I'm getting off topic, I don't know where I was going with this.
Oh yes! I'm stealing her idea! I'm going to do 365 days of blogging, so that this time next year, as a freshman in college, I can look back and see where I have come from, the struggles I've faced, the memories I've made. I'm not sharing this with very many people that I really talk to IRL though, due to the fact I want to be as open and honest about everything that's happening as possible.
I don't really know what to tell you about myself, and I'm sure there are going to be days where I don't really have much to talk about, so I'll just talk about myself then. (I think I might have stolen that idea from the girl, but shh ;P)
So, today was my first day back to school after winter break. I'm a senior in high school, and I graduate in 135 days. I'm pretty excited to graduate, so I can go out and see the world and get all of the new opportunities and la-dee-dah? You know what I mean. But, at the same time, I'm terrified. I know I'm great with meeting people, and my best friend already goes to the college that I'm going to, but it's still scary because I'll be away from my parents who I haven't been away from for more than a week, ever... But, it will be awesome so that I can grow and develop into the person that I want to be.
Anyways, school today was kind of lovely. I felt happier than I did most of last semester. I shook off my depression over Winter Break and now I'm back to me, which is happy. After school I had guitar lessons, which are going quite great in my opinion. My instructor is just really wonderful, he makes me laugh because he goes off topic and everything. I don't know, he's a great guy and he's really skilled at what he does.
I'm starting to really love guitar (well I have been loving it for the past month), but I mean LOVE IT, love it, because it gets my mind off of everything that is happening, for five seconds, and I don't know, it's just a great feeling.
On another hand, I realized today that I need to live in the moment, and stop thinking and hoping it was the future, because if I do, I won't realize all the great opportunities that I see everyday. I'll miss EVERYTHING, and I don't want to miss ANYTHING. You can't turn back time.
And with that living in the moment, I think I've finally decided I don't want a relationship right now. For many different reasons. Sure, I love having someone to call at the end of everyday, someone to cuddle with in movies, but I have friends for that! And, I'm so young. Plus, I'm afraid of commitment, and I'm not good with it. I just don't like it, I don't see why I'm always looking for it. Maybe if I find the right guy/girl I'd commit, but right now I kind of just want to have fun and go out on dates and meet people and everything. I've been single for over 6 months now and I'm just realizing this now... ~*sigh*~
But yeah, that's my today (well technically yesterday now :/ hehe) life. I don't know why I am awake, I am SO exhausted :/
I hope you enjoy the next 364 days, I know I will!
Love always,
Me.
Oh yes! I'm stealing her idea! I'm going to do 365 days of blogging, so that this time next year, as a freshman in college, I can look back and see where I have come from, the struggles I've faced, the memories I've made. I'm not sharing this with very many people that I really talk to IRL though, due to the fact I want to be as open and honest about everything that's happening as possible.
I don't really know what to tell you about myself, and I'm sure there are going to be days where I don't really have much to talk about, so I'll just talk about myself then. (I think I might have stolen that idea from the girl, but shh ;P)
So, today was my first day back to school after winter break. I'm a senior in high school, and I graduate in 135 days. I'm pretty excited to graduate, so I can go out and see the world and get all of the new opportunities and la-dee-dah? You know what I mean. But, at the same time, I'm terrified. I know I'm great with meeting people, and my best friend already goes to the college that I'm going to, but it's still scary because I'll be away from my parents who I haven't been away from for more than a week, ever... But, it will be awesome so that I can grow and develop into the person that I want to be.
Anyways, school today was kind of lovely. I felt happier than I did most of last semester. I shook off my depression over Winter Break and now I'm back to me, which is happy. After school I had guitar lessons, which are going quite great in my opinion. My instructor is just really wonderful, he makes me laugh because he goes off topic and everything. I don't know, he's a great guy and he's really skilled at what he does.
I'm starting to really love guitar (well I have been loving it for the past month), but I mean LOVE IT, love it, because it gets my mind off of everything that is happening, for five seconds, and I don't know, it's just a great feeling.
On another hand, I realized today that I need to live in the moment, and stop thinking and hoping it was the future, because if I do, I won't realize all the great opportunities that I see everyday. I'll miss EVERYTHING, and I don't want to miss ANYTHING. You can't turn back time.
And with that living in the moment, I think I've finally decided I don't want a relationship right now. For many different reasons. Sure, I love having someone to call at the end of everyday, someone to cuddle with in movies, but I have friends for that! And, I'm so young. Plus, I'm afraid of commitment, and I'm not good with it. I just don't like it, I don't see why I'm always looking for it. Maybe if I find the right guy/girl I'd commit, but right now I kind of just want to have fun and go out on dates and meet people and everything. I've been single for over 6 months now and I'm just realizing this now... ~*sigh*~
But yeah, that's my today (well technically yesterday now :/ hehe) life. I don't know why I am awake, I am SO exhausted :/
I hope you enjoy the next 364 days, I know I will!
Love always,
Me.
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